I guess life's a total mystery. you'd never know what would happen tomorrow :/

How i wished it was a lie,
a nightmare,
or even just a hallucination.
I didn't dare to face the reality,
didn't dare to ring the door bell.

It was the first time i was angry with heaven,
first time nothing seemed more important.
First time,
I felt so pained.

It's so painful to know how i'm feeling is only i guess 1/100 of how he is feeling. And i'm already feeling so torn D: And i finally realised how difficult it is to blink back tears and put on a brave front. Why must it be that when you are already so lost, so confused, so devastated, that you have to manage all the public relations? [But then again, you do rely on all your public relations to save your situation D:] I really pity all of them, having to swallow their tears and answer phone calls, pretending to be able to accept the reality. It all didn't seem real at all, it really seemed that we were just all living through a nightmare. A disastrous one in fact. But it all could have been worse. much worse than it already seems. I know that this is a billion times less horrid than knowing that your loved one is dying, and i guess this is what we all have to go through.

As i lay on my bed last night. It all suddenly dawned on me that nothing else was more important. Nothing else that concerned my life was more important. Missing the PSL camp for a family holiday seemed like a total crazy thing to happen. but looking back at it yesterday, it was nothing. I am so glad that we are going overseas in a week's time. i really really hope that time heals all wounds. and it probably will. i guess we all have to look on the bright side. That may not have been the best road for him, how familiar it may seem. it would, probably, be a blessing in disguise.

Face the reality.
Life's a challenge,
we just have to face it,
brave it,
and make the best out of it (:


JIAYOU (:

Together. 10:55 AM

CLOCK! ;